I long to see you that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you, that is that you and I may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith.
– Romans 1:11, 12
Broken. Shaken. Lost. 1983-84 was a year to be remembered. Not because of the joy, but because of the pain. At 25 years old and a mother of a two-year-old with another on the way, great teaching job, loving husband, and a wonderful church, I thought all was well. Then it happened. My husband did not come home one night. He tended to drink more than he should at times, but I didn’t think it was an issue. He was always a flirt, but I knew he was committed to me. When he finally came home that Saturday morning, I knew something was wrong and I was devastated. During the next few months, his drinking increased as well as his absence from home. It was obvious someone else was in the picture. I had married for forever, before God and my friends and family. I was determined to save what we had. Counseling sessions, heartfelt prayers, and countless tears could not save what I had promised to preserve. Divorce was never an option but slowly I saw it as inevitable. A marriage requires committed and faithful partners and mine only had one. I was broken. Trust? Never.
I heard a story once about a little girl who was having trouble falling asleep at night for fear of falling out of bed. Her dad would come in her room and console her and say, “Sweetheart, I have you all tucked in, there are pillows to protect you. You shouldn’t be afraid.” Her response was, “Daddy, I know that, but sometimes I just need to see you and know you will catch me if I fall.” I needed to see and feel the hedge of protection and love that Jesus provides to learn to trust again.
I knew Jesus; He was my rock and He brought me to the singles ministry at Pioneer Drive where I saw Jesus. I saw Him in worship, in Bible Study, in song, but most of all I saw Jesus in the faces of fellow believers. God knew exactly where I needed to be and where I could grow to be more like Him. Where I would feel loved, accepted, and filled with joy. I learned that my shattered trust could be restored. Romans 1: 11-12 became a stronghold for me. God’s people through their faith in Jesus Christ encouraged and comforted me with their spiritual gifts. Those gifts strengthened my faith in others, my faith in God, as well as my faith in God’s plan for my life. God, the father, my Abba, led me to a place of restoration. Allow Him to lead you, so you too, can find a place to see and know Jesus.
Unbroken. Unshakeable. Found. Trust.
Emily Ernst Meador retired as an Elementary School teacher after 32 years in the classroom. She continues to tutor and mentor to students in AISD. Emily is blessed to be a mother of five children and wife to Allan. She enjoys reading, quilting, and spending time with her family, especially her three grandchildren.