By Marianne Wood

Perhaps you need a Dammit Doll. I discovered that I did one day while at an appointment with my daughter about one year ago. The doll provides good therapy.

On visiting a new physical therapist who turned out to be a-mazing, my daughter and I noticed a brightly-colored stuffed figure at the reception desk. Boldly emblazoned on the torso of the ever so slightly humanoid doll, a label proclaimed its purpose in all caps: WHENEVER ALL THINGS DON’T GO SO WELL, AND YOU WANT TO HIT THE WALL AND YELL, HERE’S A LITTLE DAMMIT DOLL THAT YOU CAN’T DO WITHOUT. JUST GRASP IT FIRMLY BY THE LEGS AND FIND A PLACE TO SLAM IT! AS YOU WHACK THE STUFFING OUT, YELL “DAMMIT!DAMMIT!DAMMIT!” The receptionist smiled and invited us to give it a try. We did (without yelling) and felt immeasurably better. 

Now, it took a while for me to justify this action. My conscience reminded me that I’m a proper Christian sister living in the sort-of South; the Bible Belt, to be sure. So, I fretted a bit and consulted the spelling again. It didn’t say “damn it,” like cursing someone or saying that I want something to go to hell…but then again, maybe?

Yes, definitely. I want CANCER to return to the place from which it came. And I’m sure we can (you have my permission) insert—in all caps—any evil malady. The Middle East atrocities come to mind today.

While visiting with a friend, a local doctor, at my dining room table long ago when I was close to age 40, I asked him to explain cancer to me. I’d known a few older people who’d had it, but a fresh acquaintance with the dread disease had recently accepted this diagnosis. In addition, a close friend the doctor and I held in common had succumbed to breast cancer that eventually metastasized to her spine and led to her death at the age of 63. As my friend explained that day, this disease occurs when cells divide uncontrollably and spread to surrounding tissues. So I knew it was wicked then. I know it more familiarly now.

Solomon’s questions, David’s anxiety, Peter’s fickleness…we could go on. Pick your favorite biblical person; most had flaws which tell us they were real people, like us, with peccadillos and sinful ways. To be frustrated is to be human. So if a little doll or a punching bag helps you vent and feel better, let’s have a go.

Marianne Wood works as an editorial assistant and researcher for Bill Wright